that i feel as though i am on the verge of psychosis. i deal with being angry, sad, and not sleeping on a near daily basis and i know its so unhealthy. i really need a vacation. no fuck that a vacation will not eliminate the stress from my life. as soon as it's over i will be right back at square 1. i need to eliminate the unhappiness in my life. but i need to be strong. and i am having a hard time doing that.
on the upside pooots clapped her hands today. lol. i said "clap ya hands poots!!!" and she did it. lmaooooo. she makes me happy. even when she doesnt let me sleep. oh speaking of wich, there was a part on the news today about a man who killed his 1 month old baby girl by shaking her because she wouldnt sleep. OMG!!!! that is TERRIBLE!! i cant imagin how her mam must feel. so sick. my heart goes out to her and the family. i just dont know what would make some people do certain things. like hurt thier babies. i wonder what they are thinking when they do these things. because i couldnt imagin doing anything to hurt her.
however there are times i want to run away. i want to leave for weeks or months on end. but i want to take my poots with me and i know he aint letting shit go down like that.