Seems Like A lot

has been happening lately but i cant remember now what i have been wanting to write. This week and next few weeks will be sort of stressful. Because i will be working a little extra to make up for money we need saved. i really wish boyfriend would get a second job. that would help me/ us out so much. i often wonder why he is dragging his feet about it. i am worried. i am worried about rather or not we will have enough money to save for the little girl. i will be working my butt off to make sure she has what she needs. i dont even know if i will be getting a baby shower or whatever. i just dont have the money and now ( just as i predicted would happen) his mom is acting funny. You know that family really, really, really gets under my skin at times. but this is the hand i was dealt, or should i say chose. They arent BAD people, please dont misunderstand the situation, they are just reallu funny acting and weird to me. His mom and i had a reallylong conversation this weekend and i just feel so uneasy about it. About them. Whatever, i dont go with them, i go with boyfriend and thats all that matters. i just cant wait for Kira to get here because i REALLY wonder how things will transpire with her in the mix. ACTUALLY HERE. I have been trying not to think about it too much. As a matter of fact i have resolved that in themonth of January for the new year i will take control of my own happiness. i will HELP myself. I have been doing a lot better with this, but not as well as i could be. I must pray for myself a lot more. Pray, Pray, Pray.