she will be one next monday. i dont know what to say. this year has been ..... WOW! i think about the day she was born. last march the 9th. Sunday @ 5: 42 pm. i looked at her, and i thought "she looks like mina! she is soooooooooo pretty". and i was happy she didnt have all that goowy stuff on her eyes. lol. in my first month of motherhood, it didnt hit me that i was a MOTHER. to be honest it STILL hasnt. it's such a prestigious privledge to be a mother. something that only the best of the best kind of person would even deserve. there are times i look at her and i think.... how could i (lil ol' me) be YOUR mother. there are times i dont feel i even DESERVE her love and the happiness she gives me. and i really feel that motherhood, should never be taken for granted. it is a privledge. and i think about MY life, and the decisions i have made. and i wonder y she choose me. in my fist month of motherhood, i did what i was SUPPOSED to do. i changed her, fed her, and read to her to put her to sleep. But i just DID. it was almost mechanical. i didnt THINK about it. because love and motherhood, hadnt effected me yet. but it seems like almost OVERNIGHT, my love her exploded like a atom bomb. she inched gloriously into my heart and soul, and in just one year SHE has changed my life, and effected me more then ANYONE or ANYTHING iv EVER known in 23 years. she is amazing, and beautiful, and fussy, funny, loving, and every other delightful descriptive word that i cant think of now. lol.
5 mos: turning over for the forst time