THIS MONTH'S GOAL PLAN: 12/25-1/31

So I asked myself:
1.WHAT WILL I DO MONTHLY TO ACCOMPLISH MY GOALS A LITTLE AT A TIME?
2.HOW EXACTLY DO I PLAN ON ACCOMPLISHING MY GOALS?
-what i need to do monthly, weekly, daily

THIS MONTH OF 12/25-1/31
1.WHAT I WILL ACCOMPLISH:
-Personal:
*Read The Books:
''The Skin I'm In"
"Monster"
"Metu Neter"
"Who Am I Without Him"
*Keep House Clean
*Call about income housing for bigger apartment

-Financial:
*Save $900.00
*Get Cell Phone And Minutes

-Spiritual:
*Make All Meetings That I Can
*Read Some Bible Daily

-Hair:
*Keep Braids

2.HOW I ACCOMPLISH:
Personal:
*Read 1 Chapter a Day of "Metu Neter"
*Read other books as well while at work
*Clean A little DAILY

-Financial:
*Save Each Pay Check: 12/27- $150.00
1/3- $200.00
1/17-$200.00
1/24-$150.00
1/31-$200.00 TOTAL SAVED:$900.00
*Buy Cell Phone

-Spiritual:
*Make ALL meetings on days not working
*Read a few verses of the bible Daily.

i keep you posted on a regular basis as to how this goes.

The 2008 GOAL PLAN:AKIRA RAQUELL BOLLING

1.PERSONAL:
-Akira Raquell Bolling-having a baby!
-Read 50 books-personal study
-Finnish School
-Clean House-dont let it get messy
-Bigger Apartment-move
-Loose Weight

2.FINANCIAL:
-Save $1300.00 for Kira's stuff-before she gets here
-Save a little from EACH check
-Pay Medical bills
-Pay citibank

3.SPIRITUAL:
-Devin
-Make all the meeting I can
-Read bible daily

4.HAIR:
-Protective growth Challenge
-Crown-N-Glory Technique

EVERYTHING THAT I DO FROM NOW ON OUT IS FOR MY DAUGHTER AND HER LIFE. ALTHOUGH THERE MAY BE A LOT OF PERSONAL GOALS WRITTEN HERE, THEY ALL ULTIMATELY ARE FOR HER BENEFIT. THAT IS WHY SHE IS WRITTEN AS ONE OF MY PERSONAL GOALS.LOL.

It's After Christmas

Today was fun. I didnt plan on going over Devin's house to eat but ended up going a having a pretty ok time. Today, i got home and read a little bit of a book, wrote out my 2008 plan ( but everything is up in the air because of Akira. I dont now what new challenges and things life with her will bring. Up until this point when i would make my yearly plan i felt confindent going into the new year with it because all i had to worry about and concern over was me. everything is ao up in the air and tentative now), i went to sleep, woke up and cleaned the rest of the house (mopped the floors, and vacummed) , got in the shower and went to Devin's house. I'm annoyed because it seems that i cant seem to get my house to smell fresh and clean. even if looks fresh and clean. thats ok, tis weekend i will go to walmart and see what they have to clean the carpet and stuff. I was happy because i found my black work pants. i couldnt find them for the longest time. but it is deffinately time for me to buy some black maternity pants. a couple pairs. i will go to the mall at the end of this month and see what they have in the maternity stores, and victoria's secret.
The food at Devin's house that his mom prepared was really good. we had all typesof stuff. I enjoyed it. Of course he was getting on me about something. Egypt i think. Anyways it doesnt matter cause i'm always getting on him about stuff too. but when he does it , he does it in front of people. and he said something about my mom. something stupid about her hands or some dumb shit. He always has something negative to say about someone or some people. he just doesnt have a tactful tongue. he picks for NO reason. you could be the nicest , most beautiful person in the world and he will find SOMETHING wrong with you. That irritates the hell out of me about him. He is like dr. jackell and mr. hide. One minute his personality can be so sweet and loving and giving, and understanding. and then the next minute he is a saying something that changes my mind about his whole personality. Sometime i wonder if i am too critical of him. I wonder if i have a hollier then thou attitude. I always talk about his asshole personality traits but i wonder what mine are. i could name a few. but this is MY blog so i wont do that. lol.
I have come to the conclusion that in the years to come, if i focuse on my daughter and myself i wont be reminded so much of how badly my life sucks. So here is this year's plan.

Beautiful

Dont look at me every day is so wonderfulAnd suddenly, its hard to breatheNow and then, I get insecureFrom all the fame, Im so ashamedI am beautiful no matter what they sayWords cant bring me downI am beautiful in every single wayYes, words cant bring me downSo dont you bring me down todayTo all your friends, youre deliriousSo consumed in all your doomTrying hard to fill the emptinessThe piece is gone and the puzzle undoneThats the way it isYou are beautiful no matter what they sayWords wont bring you downYou are beautiful in every single wayYes, words wont bring you downDont you bring me down today...No matter what we do(no matter what we do)No matter what they say(no matter what they say)When the sun is shining throughThen the clouds wont stayAnd everywhere we go(everywhere we go)The sun wont always shine(sun wont always shine)But tomorrow will find a wayAll the other timesWe are beautiful no matter what they sayYes, words wont bring us downWe are beautiful no matter what they sayYes, words cant bring us downDont you bring me down todayDont you bring me down todayDont you bring me down today

---Christina Aguilera

Believer

Life is what you make it At least that's what they say Well, I think I'm going to make it Fulfill my dreams one day I feel this fire growing Deep inside of me I'm so inspired knowing That it's my destiny I breathe like a champion I dream I'm a champion I think I'm a champion That's led to be My will's getting stronger I can't wait any longer I'm singing a song That's inside of me Cause I'm a believer I know that I can't fake it No matter what they say Cause I'm a believer The future is now And it starts today Everyday I'm waiting Trying to find the patience So close I can taste it But sometimes it's so hard But I'm gonna keep on pushin'And I'm gonna to keep on fightin' And I'm gonna to keep on tryin' Because I've come too far I breathe like a champion I dream I'm a champion I see I'm a champion It's meant to be My will's getting stonger I can't wait any longer I'm singing a song That's inside of me Cause I'm a believer I know that I can make it No matter what they say I'm a believer The future is now It starts today Believer, ohThe future is now It starts today

---Christina Milian

I Cant Help

But feel and know that if i had waited and done things differently my pregnancy would be a much happier experience for me. I would not have had to deal with all the differences and aggrevation Devin and I go through. I would have a baby shower and KNOW that people are going to show. KNOW that i will get what i need. Not be surrounded by a bunch of people i really dont care for or feel comfortable with. He is inviting ALL his friends from work, and THATS ok because i am inviting a friend or mine who he had a tiff with. They better all bring gifts and and not just show up to eat my damn food. He thinks it's different because in his mind, AS ALWAYS, i am wrong and have no reason to feel how i do about them. If i had waited i would be happy and my feelings would be taken into consideration, with my HUSBAND. He wouldnt invite people to MY party (since i am the pregnant one) . He would let me have my one shine day (since i will be the one going through labor and delivery). We would be in sync with one another and agree with one another. I would love his thinking, we would be happy and we would have it together.

GOSH! If him or his family ever read this stuff i would SURLY have HELL to pay.

TO MALEEKA: MY SWEET DARK CHOCOLATE CANDY GIRL

WOULD YOU BE MY ALMOND JOY MY CHOCOLATE CHIP, MY HERSEY KISS, MY SWEET DARK CHOCOLATE BUTTER CRISP?

HAND AND HAND WE'D WALK TO CLASS AND SIT AND TALK IN SWEET GREEN GRASS.

ROLLAR COASTER WAY UP HIGH, PICK MOON BEAMS FROM OUT THE SKY.

WOULD YOU BE MY ALMOD JOY, MY CHOCOLATE CHIP, MY HERSEY KISS. MY SWEET DARK CHOCOLATE BUTTER CRISP?

---CALEB'S POEM TO MALEEKA