IT'S NOT IN MY HEART

I'M CRYING. I'M CRYING. I'M CRYING. PLANNING THIS BABY SHOWER IS NOT IN MY HEART. DEVIN AND HIS MOTHER ARE MAKING ME PLAN THIS SHOWER. IT'S JUST NOT THERE. MY FAMILY WONT BE THERE, ON TOP OF ME HAVING TO PUT OUT MONEY (THAT I REALLY DONT HAVE) TO DO THIS. WHO PLANS THIER OWN BABY SHOWER? I AM. I DONT WANT TO DO THIS. DEVIN'S MOM TOLD ME THAT BASICALLY I AM BEING SELFISH AND NEED TO READJUST MY THINKING , BECAUSE IT'S ABOUT KIRA'S BENEFIT. THEN Y WONT SHE PUT UP THE MONEY FOR THIS?? SHE HAS EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD TO SAY AS TO Y I SHOULD HAVE IT AND NEED TO HAVE IT BUT IS NOT PUTTING ANY MONEY TOWARDS IT. MY HEART IS BLEEDING. DEVIN NEEDS TO THROW ME THE BABY SHOWER. I WORK 2 JOBS! NIGHT AND DAY. I WORK LIKE A DOG AND I HAVE TO THROW MY OWN BABY SHOWER!? DEVIN NEEDS TO DO THIS FOR ME. SHE NEEDS TO SHUT THE FUCK UP.